A Geek's Cogitations, Conjectures and other Cortical Experiences

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Bent Over And Got Screwed

gus_facepalmSo here is my chance to berate and belittle Apple and their latest foray into product stupidity. This is probably going to be a bit of a soapbox not only about how you screw something up like manufacturing a phone that has such weak physical integrity but also to those folks that think phones should be impervious no matter where you keep them on your body.

Let me start by saying that if you keep your phone in your back pocket as if it were a wallet then you deserve a busted phone. Your phone doesn’t belong in your back pocket and if you buy the larger phone then don’t treat it like its a small phone. I really don’t understand how the iPhone 6 Plus can fit comfortably in any pants pocket.

People! Use some FRAKKING COMMON SENSE!!!!

Ok, now I’m not just going to blame the idiots out there that think all phones should be indestructible because Apple should have known better when they engineer something to be so thin and MADE OF ALUMINIUM!! As stated in Wikipedia, aluminium “is a silvery white, soft, ductile metal”. Notice the emphasis on the word “soft” (oh, and by the way “ductile” means “pliable”!!). You must engineer for the troglodytes that will put their phones in their back pockets or store items of any dimension in their pockets; you can’t assume people are smart … you know, design to the lowest common denominator (because not everyone buying smart phones are intelligent – ex: Steve Ballmer – who suddenly reminds me of Frankenstein from Young Frankenstein – sorry Peter Boyle, may he rest in peace).

Apple alleges that all phones and tablets are put through rigorous durability tests to ensure the integrity of their products; obviously their tests weren’t rigorous enough. They also claim that of the 10 million iPhones that were sold, only 9 people have come forward complaining of a bent phone. It doesn’t matter if it was 9 people, or 3 people, or 500,000 people, the fact is that it made headlines and even earned a damn hashtag (#BendGate). I will say the same thing for Apple as I said for Microsoft, I expect a lot more from a company that has been in business for so long.

Again, I’m so glad I’m on the “S-cycle” of iPhones so my next phone will have had these silly mistakes corrected … in theory …

</end soapbox>

Social Media: A Farce For Change

People are funny, especially when it comes to social media. It’s hilarious, and naive, that people think what you post on Facebook or what your profile picture is has any influence on the world. Really, nobody cares. Sure, itsupreme-court-ruling shows that you support a person, cause, group, what have you (in fact I changed mine to a Chik-Fil-A sandwich when they were getting picked on); but the Supreme Court isn’t going to check Facebook statistics before making their final decision. Don’t get me wrong, I strongly encourage folks to support their friends and family, just exercise caution and discretion when you choose to use a public medium such as Facebook and/or Twitter. Personally I think all social media does is perpetuate bullying. Yep, that’s not a typo, it only makes bullying worse. You go online and speak out for or against someone or some group and that word gets around to someone bigger, tougher and less intelligent who may not even have an differing viewpoint and you become a target.

Yes, I agree that the world probably needs to change their perspective on a few things but I really don’t think social media is the catalyst for that change. Everyone is bolder when they sit behind a computer screen but if you think you are causing change only by posting to Facebook, that’s about as effective as walking around with a Post-It note on your shirt. Real change requires real action. Some folks try to write to their congressman and others try to organize awareness events. The one thing I would discourage is getting too overzealous about it. Yes, it’s important to get the word out to make your cause known and to stress its importance but if you keep shoving it in my face day-in and day-out you’re just going to piss me off.

Yes Hollywood, I’m looking at you.

All of you bleeding heart nutjobs in Hollywood don’t need to integrate the social discrepancies into the subtext of every movie and every television show. I already see enough of that in the news and (as you may have guessed by the subject of this rant/soapbox) social media. In fact, the more something is shoved in my face the more I am going to troll about it on Facebook, Twitter and Google+ just because I know it will incite discord. There is nothing more hilarious then causing somebody’s head to explode because of a few lines of text or imgur image on Facebook.

I’ll be honest, my whole point here isn’t to pick on the folks out there that are under the delusion their profile picture will change the world, I’m more worried about the potential that it could be a contributor to bullying. Facebook has become fodder for the bullies. Whether they use it as their method of bullying or if they use the information they see to bully. It doesn’t matter. The point is that social media exacerbates bullying.

If want to show support for your cause or your friend, I get that. I think that is a function of social media; but if you think you can push your personal agenda by changing your profile picture (and urging thousands of others to do the same) in a (feeble) attempt to “show Congress”, that’s just foolishness. A bunch of senators and judges (who probably couldn’t even figure out what they want for lunch) are not going to base their vote on what you or some celebrity tweeted, “Liked”, “+1’d”, etc. Also, claiming to be an activist using such shenanigans is the same thing as claiming your not a virgin because you watch porn.

So good luck with that.

/cheers

Soapbox: Cable Companies

overworked-290x290I had to do the Cable Company dance again. I had to cancel one and switch to the other again in order to receive the better deal. I will, most likely, have to do this again in two years because our “deal” will have expired and the bill will spike up another $30-40. It’s ridiculous that I have to do this dance every other year. I don’t understand why cable companies can’t be more like cell phone companies, every two years renew your contract at a discounted rate.

Yea, I get that they probably make most of their money from people that suddenly decide they don’t give a damn when their current deal ends and they just pay the extra charges. Perhaps the number of people that actually do drop service to switch to a cheaper service is a smaller percentage. Be that as it may, I still don’t understand why they are so difficult to negotiate with when I call a month before my contract expires to try to extend my coverage and keep my lower rate. I would think they would want to keep me as a customer. Loyalty builds a steadier stream of income. I shouldn’t have to go to twitter and start berating them before I get cooperation.

I’m getting close to just “cutting-the-cord” on cable in general, I know several of my friends already have. The technology available in Blu-ray players and Smart TVs today almost make it more affordable to ditch cable and access all the shows and movies from the Internet. We just switched so, for the time being, I’m going to endure with this cable provider but when it gets close to the end of my contract then I think it will be time to be the biggest pain in the ass as possible. I’m just tired of the hassle of switching providers all the time.

/endsoapbox

Soapbox: Looney Thin-skins!

soapbox_webI cannot believe we are still having a spat over the name of the Washington Redskins! The team has been known as the Redskins since 1933! Since you’re probably too obtuse to do the math, that’s 80 years folks!! Are we really still hoping to change the name of a team that has been around for 8 decades? The thing that really grinds my last nerve about this, its not even the Native Americans that are relentlessly bitching about this!

People are too damn sensitive these days! I feel like we’re all walking on eggshells because the slightest innuendo or phrase can be misconstrued to offend someone. Maybe we need to regress back to how cavemen spoke so our reduced vocabulary and guttural noises will keep everyone happy. Obviously we’re not all intelligent enough to know the difference between intentionally offending someone and the fact that its just a damn team name!

People are too thin-skinned! Maybe we should legalize marijuana because 50 years ago the people that would protest such minutia were the potheads but they were too stoned to be taken seriously. Today, through the power of Internet and the antagonist media, they are more obnoxious then ever! If you don’t like the team name, fine! Don’t be a Washington Redskins fan. Hell, I don’t care if you hate the NFL, then go watch a Curling match, I just don’t want to hear you spew your disgusting ignorance!

On a final note, shame on you Bob Costas! You ignorant turncoat!

/end soapbox

Soapbox: Dropping the Ballmer

Steve BallmerI heard today that Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer has announced that he will retire sometime within the next 12 months.

Finally some good news for Microsoft!

Ballmer, in my opinion, has been less than stellar (and that’s me being kind). He hasn’t had a clue since the first time he came running and screaming out on the stage. He definitely knew how to wake a crowd up … and then put them all back to sleep. I think once he retires the only direction Microsoft can go is up. He doesn’t have too many accolades to be proud of since becoming CEO.

Windows Phone – FAIL.

Windows Surface – FAIL

Windows 8 – FAIL

XBox One – Almost a FAIL, but there’s still time.

Windows 7, and all the Visual Studio developer tools, are really the only noteworthy products that has come out of Microsoft’s doors in years (aside from the XBox 360, but I’m speaking specifically computers but the 360 is also a really great product!).

I really am pulling for Microsoft that the next guy to step up to the helm not only has a clue on how to market a product but really knows what the users actually want. Microsoft should no longer be trying to dictate to the user, they should be responding more on what they user wants and try to anticipate based on industry trends. I know, I make it sound so easy, so why shouldn’t I just do it. Yea, no thanks! Crazy, not stupid (though Ballmer was a bit of both – maybe a bit heavy on the “crazy”).

/endsoapbox

Soapbox: No One Deserves A Pedestal

mighty_have_fallenI’ll be honest, I was going to make this another post about Microsoft (because they are still pissing me off) but I decided that I would try to be more of an equal-opportunity troll today. Unfortunately, I am going to start with Microsoft since they are the ones who have most recently been in the (tech) news.

Microsoft has backpedaled for a second time this year, on a second product (that’s not a good track record). Obviously the first time are the changes they are making in 8.1, though I still argue that what they chose to change is half-assed. We wanted a Start Menu with the Start Button, not your vomit inducing Start Screen. But I digress. When Microsoft unveiled the XBox One they were expecting fanfare, instead they got fan-flamed. Their architectural decisions for the XBox One were not popular and they paid the price with constant mockery and ridicule. Yesterday Microsoft changed their policy on used games and the always-on DRM. I’m still not thrilled about the idea that I wouldn’t be able to play my XBox 360 games on the new console so I still don’t feel the need to buy the XBox One.

I’m kind of tired of folks putting Microsoft up on this mighty pedestal when they are actually teetering on the edge of the toilet stool. Honestly, I don’t think anyone really deserves to be up on any pedestal right now. Apple isn’t really coming up with anything truly innovative anymore. In fact I’d say they are starting to play the catch-up game right now with Google’s Android. Speaking of Android, they’re not exactly inventing much lately either.

The fact of the matter is, it seems like they (Microsoft and Apple specifically) don’t seem to be listening to their users. We’re no longer living in a vendor-driven market, this is a user-driven market. Microsoft and Apple no longer have the power to dictate to us what we will use, we are telling them what we want. It’s up to them if they choose to listen and when they don’t listen the viral backlash is awkward and unpleasant. If anyone deserves a pedestal it would probably be Google as they are the ones that seem to be taking all the Apple and Microsoft complaints and providing solutions with their phones and tablets.

So the first half of 2013 has been embarrassing and tumultuous for Microsoft and uneventful and dull for Apple. Both have a lot promised for the second half of the year, hopefully their plans will bolster their already bruised and waning reputations.

/endsoapbox

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